Here it is… again…

As a fan of the late 80′s/early 90′s show, after seeing the teasers for the Assault and Joust events, I’m ridiculously excited about AG coming back.

Things are really heating up.

What I liked about this episode:

• Sophia cursing out Guyland for acting smug about how many pounds of rocks his Red District pulled in the showdown. She’s got a dirty mouth, that Sophia!
• Blaine winning the Gold Star. He really was getting overlooked while in the Blue District with Greg.
• Greg completely owning Anjay at the Town Hall Meeting (“Mallory is more of a man than you are.”)
• Spontaneous election cliffhanger! DK! Greg! Blaine! Michael! That’ll be a fun council, especially with Greg and Blaine together as council members.  To be honest, I would’ve expected Sophia to run against Laurel, but perhaps she was in shock of the whole situation to raise her hand.  (Of course, I’m expecting no one currently on council to keep their seat.  It seems EVERYONE has a reason to hate their current council member.)

What I didn’t like about the episode:

• Laurel’s heel turn.  Putting the chemistry of the Green District ahead of the needs of the town-at-large was incredibly selfish, and her telling Anjay he should’ve been more assertive about not moving anyone out of his district falls on the same line.
• Zach’s mocking of Randi wanting to leave.  What a dick.  Not called for, especially from a council leader.  (It’s especially hypocritical because Randi was the decisive vote in Zach’s election victory over Taylor.)

What I feel “eh” about.

• Anjay should definitely be voted out; he has the leadership skills of a sponge.  He is not assertive, whiny, and breaks down easily.  (See Laurel’s thing to Anjay mentioned above.)
• Hunter, while ok as a Gold Star candidate, would’ve been Gold Star winner #5 for the Green District.  Yeah, that would’ve gone over well with the rest of the town.

This show, despite the pre-determined, adult-designed structure, has just turned a corner; it is now becoming a teenage dystopia, not unlike Lord of the Flies (Kid Nation, however, won’t have the boys repeatedly thrusting phallic-like-spears into a sow [omg spoilerz]).  The town has lost 2 reward challenges, and unless the new council can step up and lead their teams to a new reward, I’m fully expecting another election sooner than later.

(P.S. Isn’t it sad that I can write this much about Kid Nation, yet I haven’t seen past episode 1 of this season’s Survivor? They’re pretty much the same show, sans the players’ age differences.)

http://www.24trailer.com/

Thoughts:

• With CTU gone, the baddies can’t breach CTU. So apparently, the perfect defense against terrorist attacks is dissolution of the organization.
  • Although it seems now like Jack is working with / for the FBI. And that there’s a mole in there, too. Meet the new plot device, same as the old plot device.
• Tony? Not dead and a baddie? FUCK.
• Not enough Chloe. Although that other female agent that was with Jack Bauer was some kind of hot.

Looking forward to it, as usual.

As a fan of Match Game, this saddens me.

That’s 2 panelists this year.  Richard Dawson should start getting nervous.

“Brett Somers is dead.”

HOW DEAD IS SHE?

“She is so dead, when you try to get a good response out of her, she _________.”

Jokes are my coping mechanism, apparently.

R.I.P.

So I’m finally caught up with the show having let the last 5 episodes sit in my DVR until yesterday. My thoughts:

Matt Kirshen was darn impressive for a small-looking British guy. Too bad he’s gone.

I don’t remember who it was, but one of the semi-finalists ripped off this bash quote in his set. Minus points for that guy, whoever he was.

Didn’t like Dante at all. Glad he went early. Debra DiGiovanni and Gina Yashere were decent, but just didn’t make it past the elimination round. Doug Benson was pretty good as well, it was just unfortunate he got bundled in with Matt and Ralph Harris in the final heads-up.

Of the 4 that are left, my favorite is Amy Schumer. I know she’s the least experienced comic of the 4, but she’s my favorite because she’s very, very pretty, and I’m not afraid to admit it.

:heart: Amy.

W.T.F.

I spent the last three years enjoying the Cottages (the little Houses). I throughly enjoy Chase’s Australian snark, Foreman’s dyamnic with House and Cameron’s hottness.

If they’re not back next season, I’m going to be über-pissed. How am I going to make googly eyes over Jennifer Morrison if she’s not on my TV every Tuesday at 9:00pm? I need my fix damnit.

This is such bullshit.

I would usually post this on an appropriate forum, but I have a feeling I’d just be repeating what everyone else would be saying, so I’ll use my own personal soap-box to make myself feel important. And stuff.

Firstly, Dreamz is a twat. Yeah, it’s a game, but to go back on the promise that he’d give up immunity in exchange for the car was flat-out bullshit. It’s amazing how one can be gifted a $60,000 vehicle and not feel some kind of need to honor the agreement the gift was based on. It really says something about human nature, right? Not only is it a dick thing to do, but it also has an effect on the game; going back on the deal will cause the jury to think Dreamz is a dick and they won’t award him the million. Both Cassandra and Earl would beat him out in that case.

And, of course, just watching the live finale now, Earl got all 9 jury votes. It makes sense, since Cassandra did not do anything to deserve any votes (she was the weakest of the final 5 players).

(By the way, nice seating arrangements, putting Dreamz and Yau-Man right next to each other.)

Yay for Jeff getting pissed at Dreamz for not giving a straight answer at the finale recap. I think Dreamz doesn’t want to look bad and realizes that telling the truth involves him looking bad, so he doesn’t answer the question. I saw a lot of this during student government campaigns, where candidates didn’t answer questions on a regular basis. I guess answering questions polarizes you and who votes for you, but I just thinks it makes you look indecisive.

“Everything always points back to Dreamz, doesn’ it?” — Jeff, regarding Eduagdo’s elimination. True dat son.

Happy for Earl. Yay for seeing Michelle again! Nice that they brought back everyone; I did wish Michelle and Sylvia lasted a bit longer than they did, but eh, so it goes. Yay for Yau-Man. Fuck you, Dreamz.

Wikipedia is a fine resource. Nothing else on the Internet allows me to go from looking up game shows to looking up Norse mythology.

While browsing the reality TV category last Tuesday, I came across the page for Road Rules. On this page, near the bottom, a casting call is listed with a due date for Monday the 26th. This is an interesting opportunity. I remember when Road Rules first came out. I was in 6th grade and I remember the people on that show better than I do any other Road Rules or The Real World season. Just going off memory, I remember Mark (who had a tower of hair at the beginning of the season and none at the end), Kit (the hot chick), Allison (the girl from Long Island), the girl whose last name is Spottedhorse (because she’s Native American [I had to look up her first name, which is Shelly]) and Carlos (the prick).

Since then, I’ve always wondered what it would be like to be on Road Rules or The Real World. Mind you, it’s not a goal in my life to be on an MTV reality show, but more of a grand “what-if”. Well, since the age cutoff for these shows is 24, here presents my last chance to fulfill that “what-if”.

So, with only 6 days notice, I start writing what I’m going to say and deciding when I’m going to be able to send in the tape once I have it. I’ll start writing something, change a couple of words, add something else, change the order, take out an entire section, make some more edits, etc etc before I finally have something.

So, borrowing my dad’s camera, I film what I want to say in the 5 minutes I’m allowed. After the speech, I play it back and decide that it’s not going to get better before the deadline.

I also decide that right now, I’m in absolutely no condition to be on MTV or TV of any kind.

The tape played exactly as my comedy tapes did. I stutter at some points, I look away from the camera when I’m not confident in what I have to say, and I do the blinking thing when I’m trying to figure out what to say. It is incredibly obvious that putting myself in this position would absolutely ruin me. Not to mention that I could’ve included more than just me (blinking eyes and stupid voice) talking to the camera. I should’ve included some action shots and super-duper video editing, but 6 days left little time to do anything.

If this tape was going to be sent out, it would’ve been sent out today. Instead, it’s in my hand and it will not be making the cross-country trip to Bunim-Murray Productions.

To be or not to be? Not to be.

(I just wrote a blog entry about how I’m not doing something. How retarded am I?)

I fear for us as Americans.

The first guy (a UCLA graduate) used all 3 of his “cheats” on the first 3 questions, had “dropped out” after expending all of them.  The guy didn’t know that polar bears DON’T eat penguins, didn’t know how to get the height of a triangle knowing the base and area, didn’t know that Andrew Johnson was the first US president to be impeached (and the dude majored in US History).  I am saddened.

Second woman was unsure that the Mayflower was the ship the pilgrims used to sail to Plymouth in 1620.  She didn’t know what REM stands for.

The show continues tomorrow.  I’ll be sure to tune in, if only so I feel better about myself and my college education (that I haven’t forgotten yet.)

Episode 1 Challenges

Girls: Find 3 books in the library using the Dewey Decimal System
Guys:

• Get someone to rub sun block on the guy’s back
• Get a girl’s phone number
• Borrow someone’s cell phone to make a call.

Standard shenanigans here; Girls not being familiar with the library, guys not being able to approach strangers easily.

Episode 2 Challenges

Guys: Write a stand up comedy routine and perform it at the Laugh Factory in Hollywood (OMFG WHY DIDN’T I SIGN UP FOR THIS???? [My material on printers would've done marginally better than Piao's set, despite me not knowing exactly what he said because of all the bleeping]).

Girls: Act as an anchorwoman: Read a teleprompter for the intro to an interview, then conduct an interview with a co-author of Freakonomics, Stephen J. Dubner (the girls were given study material the night before, but not told exactly what the challenge was until they were brought to it.)

My boss at work told me I should be on this show. The appearence of the comedy challenge only reinforces that.

Nate’s allergy bit was pretty good. Piao’s dirty set was the most unintenionally funny thing I’ve ever seen (people who’ve seen my own set: yes, moreso than mine). Sunjay’s racial-profiling joke was ok, but his delivery completely killed whatever laughs he may have got. Mario stole his Super Mario bit from Dane Cook. Nate got 86% of the vote and deservingly so.

Sheree did well on her interview. Erin tried to bullshit her way through it and bombed. Nadia’s approach was the best given that she didn’t use any material from the book (from what was shown anyway). Cecille’s MTV approach to the interview didn’t impress. Sheree’s win was obvious given the lack of studying on the part of any of the other girls.

Tori’s sad because Sanjay won’t support her, but then she snapped back at him when he said he would’ve offered his help in studying had she not gone to sleep early? Silly girl.

Sanjay & Tori vs. Drew & Erin. Drew & Erin take this down in a sweep. That was fully expected. I’ll miss Tori’s large, fake boobs. Drew and his Star Trek uniform stay on the show, which pleases me greatly.